Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
Um....I woke up to a lipgloss covered bottle of Jack daniels in my arms..
You've kissed worse.
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
Randomize
