everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
It's not that drunk me is smarter; it's that sober me is secretly playing for the other team.
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
Randomize
