I was in the bathroom and her cat just looked at my penis with a profound hatred.
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
Randomize
