We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
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