YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
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