? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
Randomize
