i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
Randomize
