It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
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