I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
just tell him i said nine months
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
Randomize
