Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
Randomize
