she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
Please remind me tomorrow that I ate a loaf of jimmy johns bread on the toilet 5 mins ago
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
Randomize