he broke up with me so i peed in his bed
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
all my money is vodka money
I have never read a truer sentence.
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
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