his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
Drunk walkin through police station. America
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
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