so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
Randomize
