I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
Randomize
