If she catches me sniffing the seat of her office chair again, she's either going to fire me or fuck me
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
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