Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
You're like the curious george of whores
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
I know it's early but when you wake up can you please validate my life and tell me I'm not just a drunk idiot.
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
Randomize
