College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
I got to the apartment, I was handed a beer within 20 seconds, I'm glowing in the dark, there's fog everywhere, and now I'm wearing a sombrero because apparently it's silly hat night. I never want to leave.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
We were drunk having sex and I knocked over her bedside table/fish bowl and she jumped off to check if her fish was still alive but she made me pasta so it's cool
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
Randomize