If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
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I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
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I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
How I know that I'm single: when I get a save the date for a wedding & I read "& guest" my first thought was does my bottle of Jack Daniels count.
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
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