Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
I just ordered a onesie on amazon in the back of the ambulance while my patient was sleeping. I'm an adult
The housekeeper found my huge dildo under the bathroom sink, and another in the living room. I can't get much more single than this.
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
Randomize