i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
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