he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
I thought you'd have died of alcohol poisoning years ago! How'd you get my number?
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
Randomize
