His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
Randomize
