So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
Randomize
