I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
i never realize how drunk i am until i start using people as human stripper poles
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
I'm "drunk text both siblings" drunk.
Randomize