Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
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He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
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A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize