Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize
