This is not my ceiling
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
apparently i'm really good at getting wasted, having sex all night, getting multiple hickeys and oversleeping father's day brunch. this is the third year its happened.
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
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