Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
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