wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
Its hard to hear the music in here over his nasal whistle. And his breath smells like old milk. I think I need more vodka, and he better be buying. You owe me.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
Just used my flashlight app to find a gummy lifesaver I dropped on the floor
I like how you're utilizing your resources
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
I'm sitting in Madison square park surrounded by children thanking god I took emergency contraception
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
Randomize