I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
I'm drunk enough to know I'm texting you and sober enough to know what I'm saying to you
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
He shit in the fireplace
Never joke about your clitoris.
Randomize
