i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
Randomize
