i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
Randomize
