i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
Randomize
