She announced her abortion via fbk
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
I dropped her off at home and her fiancé was shitty, it was 4:30 am. I told him I was the Uber driver
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Randomize
