hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
I need a burrito and a hug.
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
I'm drunkenly throwing popcorn at a spider, fuck him. Why does his scary 8 legs get to be happy?
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
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