I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
Randomize
