ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
woke up with the bag of wine duct taped to my shoulder.
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
Randomize