we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
This morning I woke up in the entrance of a retirement home. Memory fragments from last night: making it rain with the contents of my wallet over the bridge, getting hit by a car, and a lot of running.
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
Randomize
