Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
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