I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
Ask if he wants his tooth back. It's in the freezer. In the box of hotpockets.
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
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