whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
Tolerating him while I'm not drunk is like trying to find a word that rhymes with orange
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
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