my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
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