I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
We've made a drinking game out of how many times the tornado sirens go off. We're good at tornado safety.
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
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