Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
apparently i tried to put my coat in the microwave.
my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
