Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
Randomize