they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
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