Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
I'm in a subway station watching a tranny do her makeup. This is like watching a unicorn giving birth.
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
Randomize
