it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
your goal of the night was to unlock your iPhone with your nipple. You're going places.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
Randomize
