i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
you literally stared at me for three minutes and then said "hey this tequila isn't gonna drink itself, boss"
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
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