I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
Thought I woke up to a girl giving me a handy. It was a male nurse inserting a catheter.
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
Just reminding you that you are currently drunk spooning a chair saying it "loves you unconditionally". No more rum.
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
Over Bumbled last night. I think I set my dog up on a date Sunday afternoon. I have to drive him, meet the other dog’s dad and secretly drink a bottle of champagne from a “water bottle”. This is not what I expected 30 to be like.
I know her cup size but not her name....
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