yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
dude wtf did we explode in my microwave last night?
idk but i think it had a face
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
Yeah man... I ordered donuts, drank wine, and cried to a movie with Seth Rogen in it. Do you really think I have my shit together?
Sitting in bed reading a porn novel off my phone and accidentally just made Siri start reading the most graphic part aloud. FUN FIRST NIGHT WITH THE NEW ROOMIE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
Randomize